Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Equestrian Acrobatics, or Finding Your Home

Dear Readers,

Some of you may have seen this inspiring video of stoic drafts under the weight of the spry Cristianis, a family of circus performers so strong and agile that they make even me, Fenway Bartholomule, look a bit out of shape.

The human larvae's first question, upon seeing these miraculous feats, was, "may we try this on Fenway Bartholomule?" My answer would have been, "of course, my dears. Wear soft shoes." FarmWife's, unfortunately, was, "I don't think we're quite strong enough for these tricks, but we can practice our somersaults in the living room!" FarmWife (if I may tell you one of her little secrets) does not even mount me bareback without a block. Remember, folks, that I am 14 hands and three quarters of an inch. She is 5 feet and a generous 10 inches tall, and there are those among us that think her obstacles are mental and not physical. (She is afraid to embarrass herself, I think, in front of me, Fenway Bartholomule.)

Any among you who have been following the occasional posts at Puddle Run  will recall that Tanner, the "Too Good To Be True" Paypal horse, figures in as a crazier- than-advertised new gelding. This story has not nearly reached its conclusion, but I'll give you a little spoiler: He turns out, in the end, to be totally inappropriate as a husband horse or dressage mount and totally wonderful for the sport of vaulting! Tanner, pictured, now resides at a vaulting lesson barn where he teaches spry little humans to perform acrobatic feats not unlike those demonstrated above. This is a video of the Paypal horse himself, doing the work for which he placed in the medals at the 2008 American Vaulting Association national championships. Goes to show, as FarmWife's favorite dressage trainer likes to say, that there is a seat for every ass.

Much as FarmWife has parted with her red heeler to to a home where the dog will, one hopes, thrive and blossom, she parted with Tanner in 2007 to a home where he has become a beloved team member and a cherished friend. My own Mr. B parted with me a year ago that I might move up from Lawn Ornament Mule (not that I wasn't well liked as such!) to Beloved and Most Important Mule of FarmWife's Heart. I like my new station in life, and I like it when Mr. B stops by with a pat. It is nice to be an animal in the right home, and Bent Barrow Farm is the right home for me.

Love,
Fenway Bartholomule


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